The Inner Child hasn't Grown Up

some smiles

This says it all

On Being Children

I’m having difficulty translating the significance of last class’s trip to the edible schoolyard into words. It’s always difficult to translate a meaningful experience into words; words can only do so much. I am not trying to convey the whole experience but merely those 5 minutes we were given to be children again. That was a gift. It was a gift to feel like a child for a moment, to see everyone else uncover their inner child without reservation. That was a genuine five minutes. Look back on pictures, you’ll find that no one is forcing a smile, or even giving a half smile; we’re all wearing genuine smiles of absolute bliss. It’s nice to know that the inner child hasn’t grown up, it’s comforting especially when I feel more and more like an adult as we get closer to graduation. I’m astonished that a direction as simple as “go play” had such a significant impact on everyone. I went up in the plane at one point and found Dave and Amy ( I think) pressing buttons, flicking switching, pretending to fly the thing. I hopped in the fire truck (A real fire truck!) and Jason and I were suddenly firemen. And then I found myself drawn to the play construction house and went down into the block pit with Ellee and Riley and starting building like I was in first grade. Why don’t we have play time anymore?! There’s so much pressure to be adults in the “real world.” We have our gender roles to fulfill, our masks to wear, our inner child to protect. It’s sad, really. Imagine if we brought two opposing parties to the children’s museum and told them to “go play.” We could put an end to war, we could resolve conflicts. Fuck mediation, I’d put two parties in the block pit. Put two leaders of countries at war in a ball pit and we’d have world peace. It’s impossible not to see the human in one another when you’re in a situation where it is safe to 

let the inner child come out.

The Dilemma of the PECS Major

Kat said a few things that resonated with me.  At one point she was describing how helpful it was to have Guilford people around after graduation because when people at work say things that aren’t as culturally sensitive or perpetuate inequality it’s nice to have someone at home to vent to. It resonated with me to see her get so worked up as she described her internal reaction, “Do you realize how fucked up what you’re saying is?” in response to another.  I know what that passion feels like. A reaction that isn’t limited to PECS majors but fairly common (I think) among Guilford students, that frustration is incredibly familiar to me given my discipline, and I felt right at home to hear another PECS major express it.  It is a constant struggle in our discipline to promote peace. Violence is relentless in its efforts and as people that feel passionately about the betterment of human life, we are constantly burdened by structures that perpetuate violence like inequality gaps, racism, cultural insensitivity, dehumanization, etc…Kat expressed that frustration beautifully.

Seizing Opportunities

Another thing has to do with taking chances and being open to the world. Leo Buscaglia talks about in his book “Love: What Life is All About,” how a person that has learned to love fully is a person that is more willing to take chances because while the possible negative outcome to a situation is more apparent to the pessimistic person, the person who has learned to love can see that instead of thinking “what if they don’t want me to join them?” will see that he/she has an equal chance at, “What if they do want me to join them, what if they say yes?” I think pessimistic attitudes keep us from wonderful opportunities. Hey, I’m as guilty as the next person, and it’s too bad. One really has to learn and work on being optimistic, or being more loving. We talked about that in class, Kat could have said, “But I don’t know if I’m qualified for that job, but what if they reject me?” It took a little courage for her to walk in there and ask for a job, 

but it’s a good thing she did.

Vision Board

According to Wikipedia, “Synchronicity is the experience of two or more events, that are apparently causally unrelated or unlikely to occur together by chance, that are observed to occur together in a meaningful manner.” The day before, or maybe even that morning before we went to the edible schoolyard, I had a conversation with my mom and she told me to make a vision board because the astrology was right or whatever. Lo and behold, I find myself sitting in Nonni’s house and Kat tells us to make a vision board! Okay, sounds like a good idea. I can see well enough to pick out the meaning in that. So I thought about the future and thought up things like, “I want a job that gives me meaning. I want a job where I can make a difference in people’s lives, where I can actualize my potential as well as theirs. I want to be with people one-on-one. I also want flexibility…I want enough money to be comfortable and be able to travel… I want to be with people that I love everyday and be part of a community that is genuine…” 

You should make a vision board too.